


Thought that might shut you up

by PhilCoulsonLover



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Agents of SHIELD, F/M, Philinda - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-05-13 10:29:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14747126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhilCoulsonLover/pseuds/PhilCoulsonLover
Summary: The moment that Philinda started to become a real thing. May tells Coulson she loves him. He freezes...What else could possibly happen?





	1. That's Me, I love you!

“You don’t get to make that decision alone. That decision is made with the people who love you, and that's me! I love you!” 

Phil Coulson stands there in shock as he looks at an Angry Melinda May. He can’t move or talk, just in total shock. In some ways he knew she loved him but he just didn’t want to admit it to himself. Phil Coulson was the type to keep things bottled up inside. After all, he was dying. 

“Thought that might shut you up!” 

As May walks away, Phil just stands there. She can’t help but panic as she can’t believe she just said that to him. They had been through so much. He is dying but she doesn’t want him to. Secretly she hopes that was the hope he needed to hold on. All she wants is for him to fight. 

May gets to her room and slams the door shut. She sits down on her bed and her hands go to her face. Tears flow as she just remembers the look on Coulson’s face as she yells I love you to him. He hadn’t said a damn thing. How could he just not say anything back she wondered to herself. 

 

Coulson is left standing in the hallway as the words of I love you going through his mind. He couldn’t believe it but he honestly didn’t want to believe it. He repeated to himself how he has made peace with dying. He can’t have more attachments. She was just angry at him. 

Phil walked down the hallway and there stood May. “Your Late!” she yelled as he came up to here. “Wait, Please! We didn’t get a chance to finish our conversation.” “I said all I needed to say.” As she waits for a moment in hopes she will get a response. She mumbled under her breathe, yeah, I didn’t think so. 

 

Coulson again is left standing by himself, he can’t believe he keeps freezing up. He feels so stupid but he could see the anger, the hurt in her eyes. He can’t stand the thought of hurting May. He loves her to much…. He told himself, I love her. “Oh God, I love her” he says out loud but as he starts to blush he is thankful no one is around to hear him. 

Coulson shakes his head to get out of the daze he was in, and says to himself, I must find May. NOW! 

After the mission report and being told he was staying behind, May just looked at him, he couldn’t take the anger. He needed to talk to her, He just couldn’t figure out how to stop freezing. He was the one good with words, he always was good on his feet when it came to talking. Why suddenly can he not talk around his best friend. Coulson walked down the hallway and was determined to talk to her. He stopped by her room and just stood there. He started to knock but again he couldn’t. He started to freeze up again as the door opened. 

“What are you doing Phil? May asked him as he stood there frozen with his hand up in the air. 

“I need to talk to you Melin..” 

“Phil, please if you don’t feel the same way…I just need space. I love you and I have for a long time. I thought for a while maybe you did. I just…I just need ….”

Time Froze, he had no idea what he was doing. He barely remembers it. He just grabbed her and kissed her. Time Slowed down, as their lips touched. He pulled her in soft but sudden. This was a moment he never thought would happen. She was real, the Real Melinda May.  
May placed her hand on his heart, her other hand around to his shoulder. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever experienced. Her heart started racing as they broke their kiss. She looked up at him. For the first time in a long while, she was speechless. Mind racing but speechless nonetheless. 

Phil looked at her and smiled. “Thought that might shut you up!” 

May just looked at him and smiled. Coulson brings her back in for another kiss and it lasts even longer this time. As they break to get a breath. Phil looks at her and says, “I love you too May, I Love you so much!” May smiles again as she looks deep into his eyes. She whispers, I was hoping you would say that. 

May grabs Coulson’s hand and guides him into her room. She shuts the door but never once took her eyes off him. Phil’s heart starts racing as his mind starts wondering. 

“Phil, I need you! – As May locks the door behind her.


	2. "I love you Phil, All of you!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their first kiss, May needs Coulson. In ways that she cant talk about, but has to show him.

May walked towards Coulson and put her hand against his face. He nudges his cheek Inwards and lets out a sigh. She pulls him in for a kiss and it was passionate. She slid her tongue in and moaned at the taste of him. She needed him more than she realized. May was driven by her pure desire. Phil put his hands on her back and just kept guiding them up and down slowly. May’s hand brushed his neck and moaned in his mouth. He broke the kiss to stare into her eyes. The most beautiful eyes he had ever seen. He swore he could see her soul through her eyes. It was completely mesmerizing. 

“I am lost without you, more than I ever could have imagined. I love you Melinda May!” Coulson said as he pulled her in and kissed her neck. He couldn’t help it, he needed to taste more of the woman he loved. Her hands moved from his neck to his back and then down to his waste. She began to pull his shirt up and he started to stop her. May looked at him and started to say its ok. Phil loved her but he was still self-conscious about what his body looked like. The scar on his chest, even though May had seen it before. It still felt weird about it. Now he has black lines all over his chest. He just didn’t want to ruin the moment. 

“I love you Phil, All of you! – She began to take his shirt off and this time even though hesitant, he let her. She ran her fingers up and down his body, taking in every inch of him. She needed this and she needed him. She took her time which almost killed him (of course figuratively) 

Phil leads her to the bed and finishes stripping in front of her. Her breathing picks up, almost in a slight moan. She can’t express the need she has for this man. Her Man! He then starts to take her clothes off, as she lets him, with pleasure. She lays on the bed staring at him, with a smile and legs apart, completely naked. His mischievous grin burned into her skin…. The passionate love making enthralled them both as they both laid breathless afterwards. 

May looks at Phil and all she can do is smile. She is once again speechless and cannot believe she spent her whole life not knowing that kind of pleasure. 

 

May leans over and kisses the love of her life. As they cuddle and fall asleep in each other’s arms for the first time in their life. They are finally together in love, truly happy. 

The next morning May is gone as Coulson looks around for her. He starts to panic but then he saw a note on her side of the bed. She wrote that she was going to do her normal routine. He knows where to find her…

As she is doing her normal morning workout, Phil walks in and doesn’t say a word. He had seen her do this countless of times but this time it was different. She was different, in a way he had never seen her. As crazy as it sounds, it was happiness. 

Phil just stands there staring and honestly lost track of time and lost in his own head. He is standing there with the biggest grin on his face. May looks at him and stops and starts talking to him. He doesn’t even realize it at first. 

“You look so goofy just standing there smiling. Coulson, Earth to Coulson!” May continues to say until he finally comes around. 

“What did you say? Sorry I was in my own little world” – “I could tell!” – May says as she laughs a little. 

She walks up to Phil and gives him a deep kiss. They are out in the open, yet they didn’t care. They got lost in each other, Hands roaming. Coulson breaks the kiss and after gathering himself for a moment – “Wow! I don’t think I will ever not enjoy you.” 

May smirks and says well you will need to wait a little while because we have a mission. Melinda May walks away but Coulson enjoys watching her leave….then he follows her.


	3. "I've Got you Phil, I've Always got you!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They return from the mission, but Phil is dying....

May and Coulson get back from their mission. After going to space and fighting Aliens, they seem to not have such a hard time with the basic missions anymore. Coulson is the Director so to speak but he is working on putting Daisy Johnson in charge. He keeps looking to the future even though the future is more glim every single day. 

As Coulson walks down the hallway of the lighthouse, he starts to have a panic attack. Was it a panic attack? His chest felt like it was outside of him, its getting harder and harder to breath. His vision begins to go blurry. He leans against the wall and as he starts to slip down to a sitting position, may finds him and runs to him. “Coulson! Coulson!” may yells as he falls to the ground. 

I’ve got you Phil, I’ve always got you. Please hang on!” May says in more of a yell than she means. 

Daisy hears the yelling and comes to the doorway of the control center to see what is going on. As she sees Coulson laying on the ground. Her heart starts beating fast, a Man who she has looked up to for years, the man that has given her more hope and more family and more love is dying. 

“Dad! No Please, Dad wake up.” Daisy says as she joins May in trying to wake him up. 

Not sure of what to do, daisy grabs her phone and calls Simmons. 

“Simmons, Coulson is down. Hurry!” as her breathing gets heavy, worried out of her mind. 

Jemma Simmons gets Coulson in a bed in the Med Bay and has him set up on oxygen. She has his vitals and heart under check. He is very weak and not sure what to do. They must do something though, they can’t let their leader, the father die. Coulson may have died before but it was before they had really become a family. Fury had brought him back with Alien blood. Fury…. Fury would know what to do. 

Simmons pulls aside Daisy and May to talk to them about Coulson’s condition. Letting them know that he is stable but extremely weak. His heart is failing. They knew about his Deal with the Devil…. His deal with Ghost Rider. Of all things, they couldn’t believe he hid that from them. They loved him more than anything in this world and he refused to let them help him. He cannot die…he will not die Simmons told them. 

May and Daisy look at Simmons with confused look. They look at each other then back at Simmons. “What can we do? May asks faintly because the love her of life is dying and she can’t do a damn thing to stop it. 

“I have an idea, but I am going to need your all’s help. I don’t know if it will work but we have to try. We just have to” Jemma Demands. “I need you to find a way to contact Nick Fury, I believe he may be our only hope May.” 

Agent May looks at Simmons in shock but then it hits her. He saved him before, why couldn’t be do it again. 

“I will start looking now – Daisy, I have some leads you can follow.” May says as the go their separate ways. 

May is the only one who stayed behind in the Med Bay. She needed to see Coulson. 

“I love you Phil, you have to fight this. Please fight this!” She says as she sits down beside him. She grabs his hand and holds on tight. She begins to cry but she doesn’t care who sees her. The great Melinda May, the Calvary…. being brought to tears. This is Phil, the love of her life. He is her everything. 

Coulson begins to wake up, still weak but his eyes open. He looks around and sees May sitting over him crying. He starts to move and she looks up to see him. 

“Oh, Thank God! Phil your awake. I was so worried.”

“Oh, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I…I passed out.” Phil says in a raspy voice. The oxygen really did a number on his throat. You know Melinda, you won’t get rid of me that easy. As he smirks at her. 

She smiles but still with a worried look in her eyes. I won’t let it happen Phil, you can’t die. Not now…not ev…

Phil interrupts her - “Now Melinda, you know damn well everyone has an expiration date.” Mine just is sooner than we had hoped. 

 

“No Phil, your wrong. Yours isn’t as soon as we had hoped. You want to know why? Because you are making damn sure that no one else has a say so. You don’t get to make those decisions alone. Do I not get a say so? Am I not worth the consideration? IS everything that happened last night not worth to sit back and take another look at this? Because this is a decision you made on your own. You had no right to do this alone. Anyone could have made that deal to kill Aida. Yet you went behind all of our backs and decided alone, to do this. Then hid it from everyone. So, no Phil, You DON’T get to say that. Because I will be damned if you get to lay there and waste away. I will not allow it!” 

Phil looks at her dumbfounded, not sure of what to say to that. The confession of the woman he loves, how could he be so stupid to think she would let him die without trying to do something. 

May stands up and kisses him on the forehead. You will not die if I have anything to say about it. 

May walks out of the Med Bay, leaving Coulson behind thinking about what could possibly be up her sleeve in saving his life.


	4. Agent May, This is Steve Rogers.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phone call that might just save Phil's life...

May is walking in the hallway as she stops and pulls out her phone. She sees that Daisy texted her. She couldn’t seem to get ahold of Fury even though she tried multiple channels. 

May decides to try and call Maria Hill. She just gets a voicemail, she mumbles to herself. Of course, just a voicemail. After she leaves her a message, may gets so frustrated that she punches the wall. Melinda is usually in complete control of herself. It shocks even her that she lost it. Even when Grant Ward turned his back on the team, she kept it within herself. She accepted it, held it in and of course used it against him. She is just beyond frustrated, she just wants a way…one way. She would give her life to save Phil. 

She leans up against the wall as tears start flowing again. She gets frustrated with herself for being so emotional. May begins to put her phone away as it rang. She stands straight up and looks down at her phone. She gasps as she answers the phone and puts it up to her ear. “Hello?” 

“Is this Melinda May?” The man on the phone asks. 

“Yes, it is.” May replied. She held in a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding. 

“Agent May, this is Steve Rogers.”

She couldn’t believe it, she honestly didn’t at first. 

“Steve Rogers? Like Captain America, Steve Rogers?” May asks faintly

“Yes, that Steve Rogers.” he chuckles. – “I recently got a message stating that Phillip J Coulson was alive but dying again. To say this was unsettling is an understatement. I thought he was dead. I saw it myself. This was obviously shocking news to me but with everything else going on”…. he paused and took a breath. 

May sighed into the phone as he began to talk again. 

“To say the least, it was good news to hear. News I needed to hear right now. I am pleased to know he has been alive all this time. Can you tell me what is going on? How can I help?” 

May stood there in shock. She can’t seem to put together words. Out of everyone who they had reached out to, this wasn’t the phone call she expected. 

She was talking to the man himself, Captain America. All she could think about was the reaction Phil would have knowing that she was talking to Steve right now. 

After she calmed herself down, she began to talk. She explained what is going on and how she needs help to save him. If she could meet with him, they could go over specifics and even explain how he was saved the first time. It was something she would rather not discuss over the phone. 

Captain Rogers began to speak – “Of Course, Agent May. Things are a little crazy right now, but I think there might be a way to help. I’m not sure if you saw what just happened on the news but I am in Wakanda right now. To be completely honest, the best-case scenario would be to bring Phil to us and we sit down and discuss our options.”

“Wakanda?” May replies

“Yes, Wakanda. It is looking like, I and a majority of us will be here for the time being. I can send you the coordinates. If we can save Phil, he is someone I would really appreciate being by my side. We will need all the help we can get.” 

“What do you mean? What is going on?” May asks even though she had a weird feeling she knows the answer. 

“The end of the World….” – Rogers begins to say but stops. He paused but then continued - “If I want anyone next to me when things get rough, I’d rather Phil Coulson be by my side. I’ve never met a more dedicated and pure person than him.” 

Melinda smiles at that remark. For the first time in a long time, she feels hope…that she might get to be with Phil beyond the days Simmons says he has left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry it took so long to post this chapter. I am nervous about it and want to do right by everyone and the fandom. Yes, i am sending them to Wakanda, i feel like it would work. If you have comments or suggestions please send them.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time ever writing a Fanfic, please be patient with me. Please leave comments. I know its not much but i am so in love with Philinda i just needed to get how i felt these two should be together written down. I will come back with a 4th chapter soon.


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